Telltale Signs That Your Marriage Will Survive After Seeing A Counselor

Marriage counseling is the way to go when you cannot resolve your trivialities with your spouse. However, what may be so awful about it that some couples end up splitting without meeting a counselor?

 

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One of the highly probable reasons is that the married folks are afraid of the truths that will come out of the treatment. A fantastic therapist, after all, believes that healing starts once you find and deal with the root of the issues. Hence, he or she will inevitably try to turn every stone – even the deep-seated ones – for the sake of helping both individuals recover from the situation.

Now, of course, not all marriages survive that kind of procedure. The union may already be on the rocks, to begin with, and the counselor is only there to assist them in realizing that it is better to part ways peacefully. Nonetheless, you can always hope for the opposite. According to Lori Weisman, MA, LMHC, “Marriage counseling intensive can bring you back together.”

Below are the telltale signs that your marriage will survive after seeing a counselor.

 

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  1. You Admit Your Faults

A person who enters the counseling office with a frown but comes out in a much lighter mood is someone who most likely opened up about their mistakes to their better half and the therapist. It takes great humility to do that because it can be challenging to admit even to yourself that you are wrong. However, the fact that you acknowledged your misgivings, and vice versa, entails that there may still be a chance to preserve your union.

  1. You Are Calm

Angry people cannot ever find peace since their ability to handle logic gets clouded by intense negative emotion. Instead of hearing out the spouse’s side of the story, they will try to cut them off more than once and divert the counselor’s attention to them. Hence, the session yields zero progress. According to Mindy Newman , MA, MTS, LMHC, “Staying calm comes from healing our own anger. This is because as long as we’re meeting the world’s rage with our own rage, more rage is guaranteed.”

For your marriage to endure the therapy, you have to maintain your sensibility. There may be moments while listening wherein you want to give snide remarks, yet you should try to contain yourself until the other party finishes speaking. That may allow you to gain new information as to why your partner did this and that, as well as understand whether there is still hope for your marriage or not.

 

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  1. Your Priority Is The Family

Visiting a counselor with one primary goal – to restore your family – is the most mature thing you can do. You are both aware that if you do not make an effort to resolve your problems, you know that there will be precious kids who may have to have two Christmases, birthdays, New Years, et cetera afterward. Thus, you might not struggle too much to follow the therapist’s suggestions on how to improve your relationship as a couple. Also, do not forget that having arguments within the family is only normal. According to Kimberly Hershenson, LMSW,  “Differences are what keeps the relationship interesting.”

  1. You Start Having Sex Again

When you hate your significant other’s gut, there is no way your libido will fire up when he or she is near. To some extent, you may even find standing close to this person revolting.

However, once you consummate your marriage again, things may be looking brighter than ever for the two of you. You get to reconnect at an intimate level, which allows you to stop bickering and genuinely talk about what went wrong. Then, healing and reconciliation may finally begin.

 

In case you notice all the signs above between you and your spouse, your marriage may indeed survive after meeting a counselor.

 

Therapies To Try When Preserving Your Marriage

 

Being born in this era is a great thing. You have access to stuff that your ancestors did not even get a chance to see, e.g., smartphones, internet, supercars, et cetera. Possible cures for various problems are also available to many. As far as we know, there are even treatments for married couples who hit a rocky patch.

 

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Below are the therapies to try as an attempt to preserve one’s marriage.

 

  1. Communication Counseling

Communication-focused treatment is among the most valuable techniques out there. Quite often, partners have a hard time being on the same page and agreeing on stuff since they do not initially have the means to converse openly. One may even be judgmental, while the other is more of a submissive type; thus, the latter cannot argue with the former at all.

To improve the situation, the therapist can suggest sentence reconstruction to the couple. Use “we” or “our” a lot, for instance, instead of “I.” You may also add phrases at the beginning of every comment that indicates that you truly listened to what your partner said recently. If you can do that, your marriage may soon be out of danger. According to Dr. Jesse D. Matthews, “Talking about it and trying to find an understanding is what will help a couple to find or stay in a healthy place.”

 

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  1. Positive Psychology

As the name signifies, this form of counseling focuses on helping couples like you to touch base with the joyful aspects of your relationship. Kasi Howard, PsyD suggests “If I’m getting down or feeling anxious, I’ll make a list of things that I’m grateful for, it flips my mindset and keeps me from ruminating on things that are stressful, or from focusing on the negative. Plus, it’s a big mood lifter.”

A counselor does that by asking each person to write happy moments on a journal daily. In case one session proves that you forgot to do so, he or she may throw pages in the mix as a means of reminding you to take note of your fantastic meetings as a couple. Ideally, by the end of your treatment, you will be able to acknowledge the positive points of being with one another even without a therapist’s encouragement.

 

  1. Narrative Therapy

Considering you are highly comfortable when you tell a story, the narrative type of therapy may suit you more than anything.

What occurs at the beginning of this treatment is that the counselor may allow their clients to narrate their problems from the start. Once that’s known to everyone in the room, the therapist will try to make you realize that you carry those issues, yet you are not the issue. From there, he or she can highlight the negative parts of your story, and then offer you alternative ways to look at them differently.

This practice lets you rewrite the course of your marriage for the better, in a manner of speaking.

 

  1. Psychodynamic Counseling

It is no longer strange to find an individual with a dysfunctional attitude within a union. The husband or wife might be abusive, for example, or only thinks that whatever they say is the law at home. Hence, there may always be pandemonium in that household.

When you decide to meet a therapist for psychodynamic counseling, you’ll find that this professional can assist you in figuring out each other’s behavioral pattern. Meaning to say, how do you react when this or that situation takes place? They may help you deal with buried experiences finally, which may be fueling the unusual characteristics.

 

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Trying any or all of these therapies cannot ascertain by a hundred percent that your marriage will remain intact forever. However, the fact that you are keen to go through various assessments to resolve your problems entails that you are on the right path, so good luck on your healing journey together. Take note that Sheila Kamen, PsyD, says, “What counts in making a happy marriage is not how compatible two people are, but how they deal with the incompatibilities in their marriage.”

 

Relationship Advice: Ways To Succeed At Psychotherapy

 

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When you genuinely care about your spouse, saying ‘I love you’ to him or her every day does not suffice. You should be present during the most exciting moments in their life. You have to be among the first responders whenever they send a distress call.

Nonetheless, some situations can challenge your willpower to be there for your marital relationship, including your partner’s need to undergo psychotherapy. It surely is nothing like getting a surgery, yet it can get traumatizing emotionally and mentally if you are not ready for the truths that the treatment may reveal. However, it matters to realize that the experience may be much worse on your better half’s end, especially since he or she has to relive memories, good and bad.

Once you decide that talk therapy can resolve the issues that your significant other or both have, check out the ways to succeed at it below.

 

  1. Seek A Reliable Counselor

A common pitfall of finding a mental health professional is that people tend to settle for the closest individual in town. You may say that it lessens the commute time and that any counselor will do, but that is too far from reality. According to Celeste Viciere, LMHC, “Many therapists come from different backgrounds and teaching philosophies, it’s important to understand what lens the therapist is looking from.”

 

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If you wish to achieve something miraculous through psychotherapy, you need to speak with no less than three therapists before you claim that one of them is the most suitable for your case. You may ask for recommendations from your loved ones as well, but it is vital to have a little chat with those people first to figure out whether they can genuinely help or not.

 

  1. Be Firm At What You Want To Get Out Of The Treatment

Simply put, do you want to stay in or get away from the relationship?

The folks who receive psychotherapy are not just the ones who are trying to keep their union afloat. Many also choose to go through it to gain the closure that they both require before parting ways. So, you have to inform the therapist from the beginning about the reason why you came to their office before the initial assessment even starts.

 

  1. Ask For A Period Of Peace From Extended Families And Friends

Whenever the people outside of your relationship are aware of your issues, it is possible for them to call almost daily to know how things are going between the two of you. Of course, nobody can blame them for doing so – they love the couple.

Despite that, once you enter therapy, your chances of succeeding at it may increase if you always answer others’ questions about your marital status. Save your energy for the sessions, and respectfully tell your parents, friends, and siblings that you appreciate some privacy at the moment.  According to Michael Bader, PSYD,  “What matters is that people get help in their efforts to grow, master their problems and become more effective in their lives.”

 

  1. Get Counseling ASAP

One final logic behind a failed treatment is that the couple looked for help too late. The thing is, you cannot wait for decades before talking to a counselor about getting psychotherapy when you know that something’s already wrong early in the relationship. It is no different from recognizing that you may have diabetes yet not cutting your sugar intake.

 

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Loving your partner entails that you welcome the idea of experiencing ups and downs with him or her. The fact that you need psychotherapy is an example of the unfortunate situations you may be in, for sure. Nevertheless, since you seek treatment, it can entail that there may still be hope for your relationship. Remember that says Monte Drenner, LMHC, MCAP, “When a person hears the phrase ‘I love you’ they expect certain things.” As such, you have to always live up to your promises.

How A Psychiatrist Can Help People With Bipolar Disorder

 

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Bipolar disorder is the proper term for the mental condition wherein patients experience depressive and manic symptoms on a regular basis. According to Dr. Kimberly Delaney, PsyD, PMHNP, “Bipolar disorder, also known as manic-depressive illness, is a brain disorder that causes unusual shifts in mood, energy, activity levels, and the ability to carry out day-to-day tasks.”

Having this illness is similar to forcing someone with motion sickness to go on a never-ending roller-coaster ride. The loops, twists, and turns come at short intervals without the slightest indication. You can’t reject the disorder either, regardless of how much you despise it.

In fact, you may not even know why you got the disease in the first place. Scientists have just gone far enough to deduce that it may be due to environmental or biological factors. But it may still take years – or worse, decades – before the medical world can determine what exactly causes bipolar disorder in every individual. Take note that based on the statement of John Preston, PsyD, “Bipolar disorder is probably the main psychiatric disorder where medication is absolutely essential.”

With limited information known about the condition, the only person who can help someone with bipolar disorder is a psychiatrist. He or she can do the following:

 

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  1. Diagnose The Disease Properly

People living with this mental disease are not foreign to receiving a misdiagnosis. As the symptoms are on the extreme ends of the spectrum, doctors tend to assume that they have depression or mania alone.

While there’s no assurance for it, what may increase your chances of finding the right treatment is having the psychiatrist detect your bipolar disorder at once. In this manner, you won’t have to try the healing methods for other illnesses.

 

  1. Consider Prescribing Drugs As The Final Option

Have you ever seen an elaborate card trick in slow motion to find out how it took place, and then found yourself wondering later if it’s OK to watch the magician’s handsomely?

Well, that question practically sums up how researchers feel when they focus on pills to lower the symptoms of mania and depression. In their eagerness to treat whatever aspect of the disease, they forgot about their side effects,e.g., weight gain, memory loss, and another ailment.

Such payoffs may increase the severity of your depressive episodes, especially if you’re sensitive about body image. Hence, it’s best to have a psychiatrist who will think of prescribing drugs as the last choice for treatment.

 

  1. Recommend Various Forms Of Therapy

We are lucky to live in a period wherein people have access to facilities that may treat bipolar disorder. Likewise, the remedies available are no longer limited to a couple of options. There are cognitive, behavioral, and social rhythm therapies as well that involve reshaping your intellectual patterns, deflating your stress levels, and improving your routine, respectively.

Your psychiatrist may advise you to try them one by one or simultaneously so that your life can be as healthy as possible.

 

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A point worth knowing is that scientists won’t stop searching for ways to cure bipolar disorder. According to Jose Sánchez-Moreno, PSYD, “In fact, new trends in pharmacological treatments include focusing on restoring cognitive functioning rather than psychosocial functioning.” It’s just a bit unfortunate that we only have short-term remedies for such an illness at the time of writing this article. But for the meantime, have faith in what your psychiatrist suggests as a treatment for the disease. Just like how real friends are, they won’t lead you astray in your mental health journey.

Good luck!

 

5 Ultimate Reasons Why You Should Do A 15-Minute Yoga After Work   

The modern demands of business and official work nowadays are growing every day as time passes. The first to be hit by this stress caused by the macro competition is usually the workforce a.k.a. the employees. Whether or not you are already at the top or just a starting employee, as an adult, you need to keep in mind the stress and anxiety levels you don’t know are already attacking you.  

 

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Continue reading 5 Ultimate Reasons Why You Should Do A 15-Minute Yoga After Work   

Holistic And Complementary Practices To Try With Your Partner 

The amount of stress experienced in today’s world is unparalleled. There are diseases that even the most advanced medical technology cannot address. As such, there is a resurgence for holistic and complementary healing practices to address these medical concerns.  

 

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  Continue reading Holistic And Complementary Practices To Try With Your Partner 

Habits That Damage Your Health

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A lot of people still choose to stick to their bad habits. Regardless if it is smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, not sleeping eight hours at night, not taking a break from a computer, etc. Yes, getting rid of all these can be tough. There are times that it is even easier to drop the ones that are beneficial instead of considering removing the harmful ones. Psychologically, people are more into doing stuff that they know are harmful because they test their limits. They are aware of the negative outcome but want to prove their emotional, physical, and mental capacity often. Honestly, it is not worth it.

Stop Doing This Right Now

Using A Smartphone Before Going To Bed – Not only does the artificial light from the mobile phones causes damage in the eyes, it is also responsible for melatonin reduction. Melatonin is the one responsible for regulating sleep. So when it gets disturbed, there is a buildup of confusion on wakefulness. With that, night sleep becomes impossible. People might think that it is somehow okay. But the truth is, low melatonin production can cause certain conditions such as obesity, depression, heart diseases, cancer, and fragile immune system.

Not Drinking Eight Glasses Of Water A Day – Perhaps not all people can easily follow an eight-glass of water a day. However, it should not become a habit. That is because the damages can happen when the body is no longer hydrated. People experience weight gain and loss of energy.  They feel hungrier and exhausted at the same time. There is damage in metabolism as well. In most times, it causes mental dehydration where it impairs people’s ability to concentrate and focus. In some unfortunate cases, dehydration increases the risk of stroke and heart attacks.

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Exercising Excessively – Yes, exercise is one of the most beneficial things that people should consider. It doesn’t matter if the workout is intense or well-regulated; it is still a physical activity. However, too much of it is not entirely helpful. According to a lot of studies and research, excessive exercising puts the heart at risk. There is always a professional recommendation as to where and what a person can potentially do physically. So instead of people pushing their limits, they should think about the importance of moderation.

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Not Eating Healthy Foods – It is no secret that fast food and other unhealthy foods are dangerous. However, people are still consuming this unbeneficial stuff in their bodies. If this is a habit, people should stop this because it increases the risk of developing heart problems, high blood pressure, poor nutrition, stress, and obesity. Not eating healthy foods also relates to mental disorders and other chronic diseases such as diabetes and cancer.

Not taking care of one’s health causes a lot of discomforts. It does not only in the physical aspect but as well as the emotional and mental state. So instead of loving these unhealthy habits, people should consider changing or removing them instead.

Healthy Lifestyle – That’s All It Takes

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There is a reason why you always sleep late and wake up in the morning, exhausted and often out of energy. Perhaps you have your busy schedule meddling with your social life. You probably always rush to work and skip meals because there is something wrong with your time-management. There is a buildup of stress and anxiety everywhere, and that often leads to depression and other mental illnesses. Who knows if you try to get rid of pressure by smoking cigarettes and drinking beer? Honestly, these things are all your choices. You are living in a stressed lifestyle.

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With all the negativity you bring to yourself, have you ever wondered about considering taking care of yourself? Perhaps you don’t know that your heart, body, and brain are trying to cope up with your damaging activities all day. You don’t have any idea how harmful it is for the overall development that you stick to a routine that does not help you improve at all. Well, maybe you are not that worried to have particular diseases such as high blood pressure, cardiovascular issues, chronic illnesses, and mental health problems. But mind you, all of these negative impacts can take away your precious life in an instant. So before you regret not doing anything, please do consider taking time to change your negative habits.

Consider Your Health Needs

Your brain and body require a significant amount of attention. Because with all the damages that you put them through, you have to make sure that they get to heal and recover. You do not just sleep early and drink vitamins to get rid of the harmful radicals. It takes time to get the enhanced condition your brain and body deserves. Eating healthy food is a must, and regular exercise is beneficial. Honestly, change is simple. You only need to understand the importance of your health because that is all it takes. A simple consideration of your well-being can lead to better life long achievements. Don’t you want to wake up refreshed after an hour of sleep? Don’t you wish to explore things without considering your health problems? Don’t you want to spend more time with your family and friends without the fear of losing your life in the early years? Just think about it.

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By changing your lifestyle habits, you will genuinely feel a different approach to things around you. You can become happier and fulfilled with what you can do. You can calm yourself and allow it to grow. You can become aware of your emotional and mental state. You can become more in control with your decisions and life. You will gain more strength in taking care of the people around you. Isn’t that nice?

Being healthy is always a choice. It is up to you to consider making changes with your lifestyle. No one needs to tell you what to do because for sure, you already know where and how to start. Inspire yourself to achieve more and change your lifestyle for the better.

Why Do You Need To Exercise?

 

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You probably heard it all the time that exercise is one of the essential things that can help you in almost everything. It proves to ease out emotional and mental health problems. It shows to give you better physical health, and significantly provide a better quality of life. But how is that possible? What makes exercise the most beautiful thing that you should often consider?

The Essential Benefits

  • Exercise is a fundamental way that helps you lose or gain weight. Exercise is beneficial in creating a better physique while maintaining a better-balanced weight. And since it requires energy, it allows possible health and fitness without creating some major dietary compositions. It releases healthier sets of chemicals while burning fats and destroying the body’s harmful radicals.

 

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  • Exercise allows more lean and strong muscles. That is because it enables the body to perform specific tasks that strengthen the core. Regardless of the workout program is high or low in frequency, the results will still create a massive benefit for the whole physical growth. Aside from that, exercise also helps in increase in bone density, which reduces the risk of injury.
  • Exercise provides better brain development. The growth factors affect the formulation of new blood cells, which carries the abundance of healthy chemicals through the pathways of the brain. Exercise also slows down cognitive decline, which is beneficial in reducing the risk of diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Dementia, especially among the elderly. It proves to delay the onset of mental health problems.
  • Another advantage of exercise is its ability to improve concentration. It boosts focus on a particular task and ignores disturbances and distractions. With this, the ability to manipulate and hold information appears attainable. Exercise also allows an excellent boost in memory and aids in better retention as well. It supports better learning and enhanced cognitive function.
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  • Exercise protects the body from any health-related issues. So when it gets maintained throughout life, it accompanies a lower chance of developing chronic illnesses such as diabetes, cancer, cardiovascular, and coronary heart diseases. Exercise supports the improvement of heart and lung functions as well. Regardless if it gets done intensely or moderately, the physical activity helps the organs of the body to work and function well.
  • Exercise is beneficial for mental health because it proves to reduce stress. It can improve mood and provide better sleep as well. It also helps in addressing depression and anxiety by slowly getting rid of it over time. It is essential for those people who find themselves often pressured with stuff from social and environmental factors. Exercise contributes to a better way of achieving mental health.

Insight

Exercise is very beneficial. However, overdoing it is a bad thing and may far more create massive damage than do good. So it is crucial to understand that before exercising, your body must be hydrated, and properly nourished. Your mental and emotional state should set on neutral as well. Because if you do not consider your overall physical, emotional, and mental state before trying a workout program, everything will go to waste.

How Important Is Your Health?

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Your health is essential for a lot of reasons. That is why the food you eat, and your daily routine means so much for the overall development. Sleep, healthy lifestyle, and mental awareness can make a significant difference all in all. Therefore, taking time to exercise and take nutritional program is a must because it is just as effective as taking complete medication for certain types of diseases.

You Can Do A Lot Of Things

One of the best advantages of being healthy is the amount of happiness you can get from doing the things you love. When you are physically, emotionally, and mentally fit, you can do so much in your life. You are entitled to experience hiking, mountain climbing, camping, swimming, diving, and a lot of adventurous activities you will genuinely enjoy. There is a fantastic feeling that can make you feel satisfied in living because you don’t deprive yourself of the wonders of the world that you are exploring.

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You Can Take Care Of Everything

Another reason why health is so vital is due to your potential to handle things. When you are emotionally, physically, and mentally well, you find no excuse in dealing with life problems. Whether it is financial, social, or personal matters, there is a considerable percentage that you can get through whatever it is. It will not stop you from taking care of everything. Yes, things do not often go your way. But your health can become your number one shield from life’s uncertainties.

You Are An Inch Away To Personal Development

Handling your lifestyle well, and valuing your health more than anything else, there is an excellent chance that you will live life to the fullest. However, that is not the main focus of obtaining better health. Instead, there is a tendency that valuing your wellbeing can make you grow. You will develop personal strength, abilities, and power that are useful enough to make you survive from the disturbing things that the stress and pressure give.

You Become Essential For Others

Gaining better health is not only beneficial to your growth. The truth is, the healthier you are emotionally, physically, and mentally, the more you become essential to others. You become other people’s strength and fortress in times of needs. Because you can almost do anything, you can provide friends and family the assistance they deserve.

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You Set As An Example

The best thing about gaining better health is you become a significant part of other people’s lives. The ways you handle and take care of yourself become an example, a goal, and an inspiration to those people who want to value their lives in a meaningful way. You might not see it, but you contribute a positive growth in other people’s well-being just by being healthy.

It is crucial to maintain a better quality of health. There is stuff you need to do and the sacrifices you need to take. But if all goes well and your focus is there, you will never regret how much you can benefit from having better health.