When you genuinely care about your spouse, saying ‘I love you’ to him or her every day does not suffice. You should be present during the most exciting moments in their life. You have to be among the first responders whenever they send a distress call.
Nonetheless, some situations can challenge your willpower to be there for your marital relationship, including your partner’s need to undergo psychotherapy. It surely is nothing like getting a surgery, yet it can get traumatizing emotionally and mentally if you are not ready for the truths that the treatment may reveal. However, it matters to realize that the experience may be much worse on your better half’s end, especially since he or she has to relive memories, good and bad.
Once you decide that talk therapy can resolve the issues that your significant other or both have, check out the ways to succeed at it below.
- Seek A Reliable Counselor
A common pitfall of finding a mental health professional is that people tend to settle for the closest individual in town. You may say that it lessens the commute time and that any counselor will do, but that is too far from reality. According to Celeste Viciere, LMHC, “Many therapists come from different backgrounds and teaching philosophies, it’s important to understand what lens the therapist is looking from.”
If you wish to achieve something miraculous through psychotherapy, you need to speak with no less than three therapists before you claim that one of them is the most suitable for your case. You may ask for recommendations from your loved ones as well, but it is vital to have a little chat with those people first to figure out whether they can genuinely help or not.
- Be Firm At What You Want To Get Out Of The Treatment
Simply put, do you want to stay in or get away from the relationship?
The folks who receive psychotherapy are not just the ones who are trying to keep their union afloat. Many also choose to go through it to gain the closure that they both require before parting ways. So, you have to inform the therapist from the beginning about the reason why you came to their office before the initial assessment even starts.
- Ask For A Period Of Peace From Extended Families And Friends
Whenever the people outside of your relationship are aware of your issues, it is possible for them to call almost daily to know how things are going between the two of you. Of course, nobody can blame them for doing so – they love the couple.
Despite that, once you enter therapy, your chances of succeeding at it may increase if you always answer others’ questions about your marital status. Save your energy for the sessions, and respectfully tell your parents, friends, and siblings that you appreciate some privacy at the moment. According to Michael Bader, PSYD, “What matters is that people get help in their efforts to grow, master their problems and become more effective in their lives.”
- Get Counseling ASAP
One final logic behind a failed treatment is that the couple looked for help too late. The thing is, you cannot wait for decades before talking to a counselor about getting psychotherapy when you know that something’s already wrong early in the relationship. It is no different from recognizing that you may have diabetes yet not cutting your sugar intake.
Loving your partner entails that you welcome the idea of experiencing ups and downs with him or her. The fact that you need psychotherapy is an example of the unfortunate situations you may be in, for sure. Nevertheless, since you seek treatment, it can entail that there may still be hope for your relationship. Remember that says Monte Drenner, LMHC, MCAP, “When a person hears the phrase ‘I love you’ they expect certain things.” As such, you have to always live up to your promises.